Just a little love story

All of the sudden, I realized that things weren't right. My hands gripped the steering wheel tightly, mostly to stave off any inclination to fidget. I am notorious for fidgeting when I am nervous, concentrating, or experiencing overwhelming stress. Those that know me well enough can easily call me out on any one of these things, even if I won't admit to it. I hate moments of awkward silence, especially in the car. His eyes were searching for something more fascinating than me on the side of the road. I in turn concentrated on the road ahead of me. I always have something to say but of course I couldn't muster any semblance of a thought at this moment. Wanting to turn up the radio desperately but unable to remove my fingers from the apparent magnetism of the wheel.

"When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up?"
"Well", he paused, "Just normal stuff like a doctor or a lawyer, what about you?"
"For a while I really wanted to be a judge I used to have my Barbie's plead cases about fashion misdemeanors to the G.I. Joe's".
"Oh, weird".
"Yea, I know. Then I really wanted to be a Senator. I used to write up bills like, Lindsay needs a new toy where as, her other toys are old, where as she would really enjoy a new one, there for, you should buy her one. Then I would give them to my dad and he would veto them all. Eventually he told me our household wasn't a democracy, it was a dictatorship. I asked him one time if he was like Hitler. Then he got really mad at me".
"I wanted to be the president for a while" he replied.
"I'd rather be the supreme world ruler".
"That's not a job."
"I know. I'd be really good at it though if it was one".
"Have you always had to be better than everyone?"
Partly shocked, partly thanking the Lord for him finally being assertive, "I guess so", I nonchalantly answered.

It was at the exact moment that I figured out that he and I were not going to work. I needed a challenge, someone else who wasn't keen on settling or letting me win at everything. The thing is, I need someone who is going to keep me going. Without a competition I'm a useless human being. It probably isn't anywhere near healthy to consider the nature of a relationship as competitive. But it works for me. I need friends and significant others that have their own lives, goals, and ambitions. Weird that I knew more people like that in high school than I do now.