Internal Dialogue

I have a crush on a boy who understands my quirky jokes and
appreciates my encyclopedia like knowledge of random things (or at
least pretends to)
He is totally not my type.
Then again, I don't meet many men that are my type.
That's because the men I think are my type end up being completely wrong for me.
Funny how that works.
So, I guess I don't really have a type, just a list of preferable qualities.
Intelligent, concerned about things beyond his immediate sphere of
existence, confident...things like that.
Things that can be easily faked and often are.
Trust me, I know. How did I come to have at least five subscriptions
to car magazines?
There was boy who I liked who probably liked cars more than he liked girls.
I don't like him anymore, but I still like cars and for sure know too
much about them (at least I have that, right?)

I probably don't even have a crush.
I am just excited by the fact that a man actually has made an effort
to talk to me on multiple occasions.
And don't you worry, I have initiated my fair share of
flirtation-laced conversations with men.
I know, I have been daring.
But none of them seem to care whether or not I talk to them like this one does.
He is probably just being nice since we did sort of know one another years ago.
And it would probably be rude if he didn't say at least hello from now on.
Who knows.
This is hopeless.