Him.

He seems to require everything in excess. Cigarettes, booze, books,
talking, drugs, me. It's all kind of enchanting really. I'm fascinated
by his lifestyle. To be wanted all the time is a bit of a change and I
know it's merely a manifestation of his addictive personality, but
it's kind of alluring. The best part of it all is that it's all so
wrong. But I've got this sort of magnetic draw to him and I'm not
going to fight it right now. It isn't really a sustainable situation.
I don't smoke, I don't typically drink at 10:00am. I have to be at
work sometime before 8:00am. I know this is temporary, it always is.
My interest will suddenly fade, his phone calls will go unreturned.
One morning I'll wake up and just shrug it off as if it never happened
and I'll just walk away from it all. I'll just have to, never knowing
when it will happen or why it does happen. But something will click,
my tolerance for attitudinal dissonance will disintegrate and I will
find him disgustingly obnoxious. I will have conquered him and be
compelled to throw him to the wayside for some other troubled girl to
feast upon. At times I wonder why it has to be like this. There are
always more of them maybe not forever but for now there are plenty.