Survey says...

What do you get when you mix a dozen half full bottles of liquor, some sprite, six sorority girls, a board game or two, frozen pizzas, and a little music? Girls Gone Wild? No silly, a dance party of course. It was productive in that we finally met some of our neighbors. They intruded upon our little party with laser pointers and oranges launched across the backyard. I told them my name was Isabella and that I worked at Hooters. Consequently, I was wearing a Hooter's girl tank top. Shortly there after I am pretty certain I passed out on my bathroom floor. I awoke to find girls sprawled throughout the house in various states of consciousness.

I still feel drunk and I probably am because I ate an entire whopper from Burger King and the fries too and I hate fast food. Good thing my plans for the night include nothing other than walking around the house naked. I will remember to close the blinds because I don't think the neighbors need to meet anymore of Isabella.

For the record IKEA is most definitely the third or fourth circle of hell. It makes me feel taken advantage of and manipulated. The consumerism is overwhelming, the navy, pleated, and tapered uniform pants are hellacious, and the products are offensive. Worst of all, the labryinth set-up traps me and even though all I want is to buy a desk lamp, I first must look at plants, candles, photographs, and silverware and this is even when you illegally use the employee entrance to avoid the showroom floor. Sure they have cheap furniture that you must spend eight hours assembling only for it to fall apart six months later while you are moving it. Of course the only things I like are overpriced and could be found at any furniture store without the hassle of being accosted by blue and yellow everywhere you look. Okay, maybe I am bitter but IKEA scares me.