I start a lot of stories with "I dated a guy once..."
(a) I'm just a closet whore
(b) These relationship must be cataclysmically short because...
(c) I sure have plenty of time to complain about being single
No. It's true. I've dated many many many men. A lot of them were distractions. A few of them were semi-legitimate attempts at a relationship.
My problem is, I often begin relationships for the sake of being in one. More often than not, it has little to do with the boy in question and more to do with me being bored with paying for my own dinner and not having someone to hold hands with.
Other times, boy and I enter into a quasi-relationship minus that nagging commitment component and at some point either one of us (usually the boy) wants something more.
I know, you don't believe me.
But boys can be easily deluded.
Especially by me, I am manipulative.
And conniving and most generally evil.
Oh, yes I am scared of commitment.
Because, you never know what might be out there and you certainly wouldn't want obnoxious feelings getting in the way of pursuing pure genetic perfection. So I am going to take the easy way out and blame in on biology.
Why do I do the things I do? Because my ovaries told me so.
4 comments:
You sound scary to date.
I am. There are certainly many gentlemen that would provide a testimonial to that very fact.
BUT, scary is what makes things sooo fun.
Maybe yes.
Likely no.
It is all clearly a defense mechanism. I grew up in an environment where emotion was a weakness that never got you anywhere. Thus, everything is internalized (good and bad).
I am capable of revealing emotions and feeling empathy towards others in very limited circumstances.
There was one boy who once was loved and I was very happy. But then I ruined it all and it broke both of our hearts. After that, every boy who confessed his love had to watch me run away.
And then there is the boy that I will never have wholly and completely and that kills me too. We are too much alike and he is smarter and more manipulative than even I could ever be.
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