Revenge is sweeet

I was thinking back to the first few weeks of college when I was just beginning to recognize my roommates evil ways. I was naive then, I thought that we were actually going to be good friends. For a while we were, infact we got along so well that friends would tell us how much they envied our roommate relationship. She was all nice, friendly, and happy until one particular point late in the semester when she just started doing evil things. Evil things like turning off all the lights at 8PM while I was attempting to do homework and then, as if the initial action wasn't bad enough, advising me to go to bed because it was getting late. It unfortunately did not stop there, because not only did she go to bed early but she woke up early as well. I could handle it at first, I would usually just grunt, roll over, and then proceed to fall asleep. But then she added vacuuming and dishwashing to her pre-dawn routine, something I just could not handle. So instead of being a responsible adult and talking to her about it, I just started being evil in my own ways.

As our battle continued the semester drew to an end. We scarcely spoke those few final weeks and we both secretly prayed that the other would not return. I actually devoted much of my winter break to hoping she would just not come back or die or something. Sadly we both came back to school more vengeful than before. In late January she declared that her boyfriend was going to be visiting for five days. I wouldn't have minded if she had, you know, ASKED if it would be alright with me. But whatever, I said fine. Stupid me didn't bother finding out when exactly this much anticipated visit would be. February came and my lovely roommate took a real interest in my Valentines Day plans, at one point she even offered tofind me a date. I casually mentioned that I might make plans to visit a friend that weekend since my love life was looking bleak. To my disappointment my plans had fallen through, a fact that I had neglected to tell my roommate but managed to share with a mutual friend. I wasn't especially concerned since she at no point had asked me to leave while her boyfriend stayed.

I returned from class at 10PM two days before her lover boy was supposed to arrive. I was accosted in the stairway by a friend who heeded warnings of what I might find in my room. Apparently the mutual friend had shared with the roommate that my plans had been cancelled, sending my already neurotic roommate into a hysterical and frantic tantrum. According to eyewitnesses she was ready to kill me because this was supposed to be her special weekend with her boyfriend...ALONE. I could have totally respected that and made plans to leave, IF I had known she didn't want me there. I was already planning to spend Valentines evening on a friends couch, but apparently when the said friend shared that information with the roommate, she replied that she didn't even want me in the building.

With full knowledge of how she felt and plans to spend the weekend at home I casually walked into my room with the intent to torture her. I acted as if I was planning on staying in the room I paid for the entire weekend. I let her speak her piece then innocently announced that I wasn't going to be there. I think I made her feel like crap. I really should have asked her to reimburse me for the time I couldn't spend in my room or charged her for usage of the TV and cable.

Don't worry, her lover boy is returning in two weeks and I'm not leaving this time!